Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
One is made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with…
The other is used to carry groceries.
90% of Fords are still on the road.
The other 10% made it home!
Do you know the punishment for bigamy?
Q. What’s the definition of mixed emotions?
A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.
Vultures and Mothers In Law
What is the difference between a vulture and your mother-in-law?
Vultures wait until your dead to pick on you.
Stevie Wonder’s Wife
Q. Have u ever saw Stevie Wonders wife?
PUNCHLINE: Neither has he.
Heavy metal guitarist
Q: How do you get a heavy metal guitarist to stop playing guitar?
A: Put sheet music in from of him.
Let a pig and a boy have everything they want, and you’ll get a good pig and a bad boy.
Waiter to customer: “Our specialty is snails.”
“I know. One of them served me the last time I was here!”
God and Gay People
If God had wanted people to be gay… he would’ve made Adam & Steve instead of Adam & Eve.
Don’t let your mind wander too far.
It is too little to go out alone!