Animals
The cow
How do you name a cow without legs?
Ground beef.
Frog meets a Psychic
A frog calls a Psychic Hotline and is told, "You're going to meet an attractive young woman who will want to know all about you."
The frog responds, "That's fantastic! Will I meet her at a party, or somewhere else?"
"No," replies the psychic. "Next semester in her biology class."
Lucky dog
What possesses four legs and an arm?
A content pit bull.
My Paw
A three legged dog enters a saloon in the old west and approaches the bar and declares:
"I'm seeking the fellow who shot my paw!"
Why do….
Why do hummingbirds hum?
They've lost the lyrics……
Horses
A horse enters a bar and the bartender asks…
"Why the sad expression?"
99 Click
Q. What makes a 99 click sound?
A. A centipede that has a wooden leg.
Bad dog
Q) How do you refer to a dog without legs?
A) It doesn't matter, he won't respond anyway!
The Fish
What did the fish say after it crashed into the concrete wall?
"Dam."
Dog life…
Ever head into a room and can't recall what you wanted?
Well, that's basically what occupies a dog's day……
Blubber trouble
Whales are part of the mammal family. Mammals come with hair.
TRIM THE WHALES!
The Lion
What did the lion say upon spotting two hunters in a jeep?
Meals on Wheels!
