Criticism

Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?

What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
One is made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with…
The other is used to carry groceries.

Ford Jokes

90% of Fords are still on the road.
The other 10% made it home!

8840155-criticism-magnifying-glass-over-background-with-different-association-terms-vector-illustrationPunishment For Bigamy

Do you know the punishment for bigamy?

Two mother-in-law’s!

Mixed Emotions

Q. What’s the definition of mixed emotions?
A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

Vultures and Mothers In Law

What is the difference between a vulture and your mother-in-law?
Vultures wait until your dead to pick on you.

Stevie Wonder’s Wife

Q. Have u ever saw Stevie Wonders wife?
A. No
PUNCHLINE: Neither has he.

Heavy metal guitarist

Q: How do you get a heavy metal guitarist to stop playing guitar?
A: Put sheet music in from of him.

Discipline

Let a pig and a boy have everything they want, and you’ll get a good pig and a bad boy.

Restaurant Specialty

Waiter to customer: “Our specialty is snails.”
“I know. One of them served me the last time I was here!”

God and Gay People

If God had wanted people to be gay… he would’ve made Adam & Steve instead of Adam & Eve.

Mind

Don’t let your mind wander too far.
It is too little to go out alone!

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